Sunday, February 1, 2015
Diagnosis day
I can still recall the day as if it was yesterday, the day she said it was Cancer. The day Joe's wife said "I went into recovery to sit with Joe, and saw the chart hanging at the end of the bed. The words large esophageal mass, presumed to be cancerous". I knew it was bad, I am a nurse after all. I felt so sad, what 32 year old man gets esophageal cancer? He lived for his wife and children, they were his life. Joe fought until his last breath to stay here for them. I have lost people in my life and as an ED nurse I understand death. However, I cannot imagine losing my spouse at 35 years old. How do you explain to your 7 year old son that his dad will never be able to coach his baseball team again? How do you carry on when you are 35 years old, have 3 sons age 7, 13 & 17, and are a widow? I cannot even imagine saying the words widow as a description for my martial status at my age much less at 35. If only Joe had his difficulty swallowing investigated when it first began until waiting until it was to late. These are questions I will ponder the rest of my life.
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I think this post shows the ER nurse's human side. Thank you for posting such a personal memory and viewpoint.
ReplyDeleteJulie Van Orne
Julie,
DeleteThank you. I hope through the posting of Joe's story that the topic of esophageal cancer becomes commonplace and simply by talking about it will help encourage those who have difficulty swallowing to get it checked out sooner rather than later.
It is so important for everyone to be aware of this type of cancer. Its very difficult to treat once its progressed. This is a wonderful way to remember your friend.
DeleteSue Matson
I think it is lovely that you included such a personal story. Thank you.
DeleteI agree, this blog pulled at my heart strings. So sorry for your loss, but the information will be invaluable.
DeleteSarah & Gayla,
DeleteThank you. I am still working on the blog and hope to format it with tabs down the
side so I can provide extra links to medical information about esophageal cancer. Joe's loss is felt daily, he was such a wonderful man and so inspiring to all that knew him. This is the least I can do to honor his memory.
-april
This is such an emotional and special blog that was created for a loved one. I think it is not only brave but important that you are able to share this heart breaking experience with the world. It provides an open forum for those who might be experiencing the same diagnosis or know someone who is. Thank you for sharing such an intimate story.
ReplyDeleteSarah,
ReplyDeleteThank you. Yes the experience is heartbreaking to say the least. My granddaughter is his Goddaughter. She was born on April 1st, and we knew that Joe's last days were coming closer and closer. He passed away on March 28th and was laid to rest on her birthday April 1st. So although her birthday is a joyous one it will forever be a sad one as Joe will not be there. He has left instructions with his wife Angela that Ryleigh is to be given a special charm for her Baptismal bracelet every year that marks something special in her life. This helps keep his memory alive for her.
April,
ReplyDeleteLee (2013) stated that there are six components to consider when creating a blog: context, audience, purpose, channel, noise, and feedback. Intended messages that participants send to each other should be clear. These messages could be distorted due to participants’ beliefs, feeling, and attitudes. According to Lee (2013), “Evidence-based writing calls for a clear and credible presentation of the writer’s claims and evidence to the target audience” (p. 246). Do you think your presentation was credible and clear? I think it was!
Gunelius (n. d.) stated that the use of purple has been known to evoke a sense of spirituality and creativity. The use of blue has been known to evoke calm, security, trust, and dependability. Do you think those were the feelings/emotions you were intending to evoke?
Culbertson (2011) stated that an effective blog has content that is compelling and causes the reader to take action in some way. Do you think that your blog will cause the reader to take action?
I personally thought the colors were very complementary. I liked how you included the links on the top so that the reader could access those resources.
References
Culbertson, M. (2011). Five ways to critique your blog. Retrieved from http://www.bloggingbasics101.com/five-ways-to-critique-your-blog/
Gunelius, S. (n. d.). The meanings of colors matter in web design. Retrieved from weblogs.about.com/od/blogdesign/tp/How-Color-Psychology-Affects-Blog-Design.htm
Lee, C. (2013). Teaching evidence-based writing using corporate blogs. IEEE Transactions on Professional Communication, 56(3), 242-254. doi:10.1109/TPC.2013.2273117
Sarah,
DeleteThank you for your kind comments. Yes this is an emotional blog one created with the intent to educate those who seek more information regarding esophageal cancer. I believe it is credible because I really want it to be a place that all who visit feel more knowledgeable about esophageal cancer which will increase awareness. I want to add links to the left side of the page (official definition, different types of esophageal cancer (2 types), signs & symptoms, diagnostic testing, potential treatment, etc., ) I believe this will add to the blogs creditability. I chose the periwinkle color as it is the representative color for esophageal cancer, and the purple just complemented it well. I am glad you like it.
Sarah, I agree with you on the color scheme that April chose for her blog. I appreciated that April added personal touches such as the quotes and Joe's picture.
DeleteMelissa,
DeleteI chose the background color trying to match the ribbon for esophageal cancer ribbon, periwinkle. The purple color was part of the suggested colors on the palate and I thought it looked nice together. To me the purple is soothing.
April,
ReplyDeleteThis is definitely an emotional blog. I believe this emotion will encourage others to seek more information and to educate themselves on the signs and symptoms of esophageal cancer. My immediate thought was I need to refresh my memory of the warning signs. I appreciate the links you provided.
Thank you for sharing such a personal story.
Dawn
Dawn,
DeleteThank you. I am working on the blog tonight to add more educational information to it. I plan on placing links that will direct visitors to an official definition, signs & symptoms, differentiation between the two types of esophageal cancer, etc. I want to increase awareness because by the time symptoms appear it may be to late. I also want to add a survivor's tab, and a tab for Joe's wife (Angela) to post stories about coping and keeping his memory alive for their children.
Esophageal cancer is not a well-known type of cancer, so having this blog may help spread the awareness.
DeleteLeanne,
DeleteI can only hope that anyone viewing this page will become interested enough in esophageal cancer that they will click on the above links and educate themselves about it. If 1 person does then this page is a success.
-april
April,
ReplyDeleteYour blog not only keeps Joe's memory alive but allows other people the opportunity to educate themselves on esophageal cancer. I am so sorry for your loss.
Melissa,
ReplyDeleteThank you for your kind comments. His loss is felt by many, but there are so many stories to keep his memory alive. I hope to keep working on the site to make it a place of comfort and education.
April,
DeleteI reviewed your blog earlier today but was unable to post. Your story is very powerful and emotional. Thank you for including your faith and a picture of Joe. You are keeping his memory alive and educating people in the process. Great Job!
Melissa,
ReplyDeleteThank you! I see your post from earlier, I appreciate you coming back to the site to post.
April,
ReplyDeleteI love the image you have posted, it places a stronger, personal connection to your blog. This is a great way to keep Joe's memory alive and also bring awareness to esophageal cancer. Thank you for your personal story.
Leticia
The picture says it all. This is a heartbreaking story and a horrendous disease. A blog like this could really help other people work through the difficulties of having a loved one become so ill. Any time you can relate personally to others, it strengthens your connection and makes you a more credible source for comfort.
DeleteBryan,
DeleteYes, I agree the picture speaks volumes about faith. Is Joe walking away from us or towards The Lord? It was taken by his wife in Maui, and literally in the right place at the right time.
Leticia,
ReplyDeleteThank you for your kind comments. I love this picture of Joe. It was taken by his wife and with the other footprints in the sand it appears as if God is walking beside him but narrow further down the sand and then it appears as if he is carrying him.
-april
Heartbreaking for more than 1 reason. My grandfather (my best friend) succumbed to esophageal cancer at the age of 73. That may seem old but he wasn't (until the cancer made him old). He had been retired for about 5 years when he was diagnosed. It was so unfair. He was finally getting to enjoy the pleasures of life after working hard all f his life. Then in a matter of days his life became about fighting cancer. The day he had to get a gastrostomy tube and start feedings was the saddest day I can ever recall in his 2 year fight. Such a cruel disease.
ReplyDeleteLinda,
DeleteThe saddest part of all of this is for esophageal cancer patients by the time the symptoms arrive it is almost to late. Joe also fought having a feeding tube placed until the very end. I advised him on more than one occasion that not getting the feeding tube was not an option. He had to keep his strength up if he wanted to be around. In the end it became very difficult for him to tolerate the feeds on his stomach because of the nausea. I am sorry that you lost your grandfather so early into his retirement. Sometimes life is so unfair.
-april
April,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your story with us! Losing someone at any time can be hard, but I feel that losing someone who is so young and has so much life left to live has to be devastating. I can't imagine thinking the word "widow" at my age, my heart goes out to Joe's family! This blog is a great way to keep his memory alive.
Kelly,
DeleteYes losing someone you love is so hard at any age, I agree. My heart was heavy the day I heard Angela say "widow". Joe passed on March 28th, so it is coming up on the first year, which I know will be very difficult for her and the boys. I can only hope she continues to find some solace in the wonderful stories and kind comments by all who have visited the blog thusfar.
-april
This is a very meaningful and personal blog. I think it will be a resource for others that are dealing with esophageal cancer, as well as your personal friends and family members that knew Joe as well. Great job so far.
ReplyDeleteJulie
Julie, the personal aspect of this blog makes all the difference in its integrity. I have to agree that it adds value as a reference for those who are fighting cancer.
DeleteJulie,
DeleteThank you for your kind comments. I am still working on the blog. I am having to watch YouTube videos to learn how to make it better. I hope everyone who visits can find some peace.
Yes it is very meaningful and personal. It is also a source of inspiration and memorandum for him.
DeleteSharon
Choosing this topic for your blog was a great gesture of sharing. His is a tragic story but out of tragedy often comes some small measure of good in that others can learn from the experience. I'm an ER nurse and I see tragedies nearly everyday, but they are never really personal. Difficult? Yes, but not personal. I have not yet had something so devastating touch my life this way. I really appreciate you telling Joe's story and giving such a touching tribute. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteBryan,
DeleteThank you for your kind comments. I can only hope through the telling of Joe's story others can learn of esophageal cancer. By sharing stories of loved ones we can keep them alive, which is what my intentions are for Ryleigh. I promised him that I would never let her forget him. This is a promise I can keep.
I enjoy how your compassion comes through for your patients. I was diagnosed with barrette's esophagus when I was just 40. The thought that I could develop esophageal cancer is scary. Thanks for getting more information out their.
ReplyDeleteSheila,
DeleteI can imagine how scary that day must have been for you. Please keep up with all of your scopes to make sure it does not develop into esophageal cancer.
-april
Thanks a lot. I get my EGD's yearly. It is no fun, but I figure the earlier it is detected the better.
DeleteApril, just hearing the 'C' word is borderline devastating. I am sorry for your loss and Joe's family's loss. I hope that through your blogspot, readers will learn that at the very first sign of change in any body part/system that they need to see a doctor. I was diagnosed with cervical carcinom-in-situ in 2010. Thankfully, I was able to be cured with just surgery, but I am much more astute when it comes to bodily changes. Thank you for sharing this touching story and for keeping his memory alive.
ReplyDeleteMary,
DeleteThank Goodness all is well with you. I can understand and personally relate to your story. I was also diagnosed with stage 3 cervical carcinoma-in-situ at the age of 19. Because of annual exams it was caught and cured. As nurses it is our number one job to educate our patients but we must remain astute to our own bodies as well.
-april
Your blog is so heartfelt and touching. I couldn't imagine having to go through what you did. I know that sharing your story will help someone else. It will also help nurses understand what families go through when their loved ones go through a devastating illness.
ReplyDeleteLeanne,
DeleteI agree, as our day to day interactions with patients sometimes become mundane we must remember our own losses to be able to understand families feelings during tragic times.
-april
April,
ReplyDeleteI love the idea of a personal journey blog. Each of us experience life from a different view. I believe that we can learn so much from others who have experienced a loved one with cancer.
Sharon
April,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing such a personal story, I am sure it was not easy to share it.
April,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing such a personal story, I am sure it was not easy to share it.